The Fucking Internets | in this land some of us fuck more than/ we die but most of us die/ better than we fuck – Charles Bukowski

Justice League Film Doesn’t HAVE to be Doomed to Fail.

The talk recently has been about how DC/Warner is pushing even harder for a Justice League movie after the success of Marvel/Disney’s Avengers.

Years ago, I stated often that Marvel would never be able to pull off decent movies because A) They didn’t seem to care about the stuff they did on film, and B) While Marvels comics are better (IMHO) and better selling than DC’s, their characters are not quite as Iconic as Batman and Superman. Point A is now moot. What they did in the past, they have since corrected with the first two X-Men films, the first two Spiderman films and the films leading up to, and including the Avengers. Point B is rapidly becoming moot as their films continue to increase the characters recognition in everyone but current comic readers.

That's right, no Aquaman. Fuck Aquaman!

So the talk on the internets today is mostly about how a Justice League movie will fail. Character recognition aside, film recognition may be the problem. With constant reboots of Batman and Superman, the worry is that confusion will reign in the box-office if Christian Bale is not Batman, and which Superman is best for the film, and how can we trust Ryan Reynolds again after Green Lantern? The problem seems to be that DC has dropped the Origin Ball in leading up to a Justice League film. How can we throw all of these characters together without people going nuts trying to figure out who’s who?

I believe that this is going to a moot point.

Again, Character Recognition is going to be the savior of a Justice League movie if handled right.

Sign Henry Cavill and Ryan Reynolds to do a Justice League film now. I don’t care how shitty Green Lantern was, or whether or not Man of Steel will be any good. Sign them. Now.

You don’t need a new Batman origin story to introduce a new Batman before a Justice League movie. Everybody on the planet knows who the hell Batman is. Hire a Batman for the Justice League, and sign him to do the new Batman reboots after. Really, it’s fine.

Nobody knows who the Martian Manhunter is? Nobody knows who Hawkman is? No Flash origin movie? Wonder Woman?  Aquaman? Ok. No Aquaman. Unless you can figure out a way to make him work. I don’t know that you can. But the rest doesn’t matter.

While Flash and Wonder Woman don’t have the same staggering level of Iconic recognition, you don’t need it. Here’s what you should do:

Steal from the Watchmen movie (and don’t worry that Watchmen bombed. It was a fan-boy movie that failed to catch on with people who didn’t know Watchmen). Open the movie with stills of newspapers and short news clips featuring most of the heroes. Flash, Batman, Superman, Hawkman if you want him. Leave out Martian Manhunter and Wonder Woman. That’s all the origin you need for now.

Establish early that Superman and Batman know each other, but don’t work together. We all know them. Everybody on the planet (in universe and in reality) knows them. That they know each other just makes sense. Show them having coffee at Wayne Manor before Supes flies off.

Then you work in the Martian Manhunter. He gets zapped to Earth (in Gotham city) via teleportation beam by Dr. Erdel like in the comics. They have coffee or something.

Meanwhile, on whatever island the Amazons live, you see the Queen or whatever being told by some shadowy figure (over coffee) that the Amazons had better play along if they want to survive what’s coming. Once he leaves, Queenie tells Diana that they may need some help, or get ready to stop whatever.

But now you introduce a less shadowy villain, who has come to steal the teleporter technology. He kills Dr. Erdel, thinks he kills the Martian Manhunter and leaves, destroying the lab and laughing all the way.

Batman investigates the death of Erdel (because he was working for Wayne Tech, natch), and comes across the Martian Manhunter. Fight ensues, Batman realizes that this is a potentially dangerous SUPER being, and calls… Superman! Who swoops in, saves the day and then everyone is happy and drinks coffee.

In space, Green Lantern is doing his GL stuff, and winds up fighting shadowy villain! GL and shadowy guy fight to a draw, and GL feels that Earth may be in DANGER!

Meanwhile Diana shows up in the States, tracking down shadowy villain. She fights some henchmen, and meets up with less shadowy villain. In the fight, he starts using the teleport technology to teleport in bad guys! Oh noes! He runs off, leaving Diana against poor odds.

Less shadowy villain now uses teleport tech in whatever city Flash lives in. He’s up to no good! Flash intervenes! Yay! Flash is getting his ass kicked! That’s when Bats, Supes and MM show up to save Flash! Because the teleporter use was being registered by Bats, and Supes heard the breaking news! Big fight! Oooh! The bad guys somehow get the drop on Supes and then… Wonder Woman! She beat the henchmen from space and saves Supes.

But then shadowy guy shows up! And more henchmen of varying power! Oh no! Bigger fighting!

And the tide is turned when GL shows up, maybe with some of the GL Corps! Why not!

Together, they go find shadowy guy and kick his ass and save the world. End credits.

Flash origin, WW origin can be covered deeper later in their own movies.

Your biggest problem is that shadowy guy should be Darkseid, and with Thanos showing up at the end of the Avengers, and with the teleporter and the invading aliens… yep. This sounds like Avengers, you’re kinda screwed there.

But this isn’t my treatment for the film. Change it up, whatever. My point is that you don’t need to establish the origins of the heroes first when you have Iconic characters. And you can do a Justice League film that would work just fine.

You’ll figure it out.


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Terminal Signal

You know how I always start projects and never get around to doing anything with them? Well, this isn’t one of them. Yet.

Just in time for me to get laid off, I decided to start a daily podcast.

Yeah, I know. The guy who can’t post shit on a fucking monthly basis is going to do something daily?

Well, I did. We’re into (sort of) the third week of the Terminal Signal podcast. I do it Monday through Friday. It’s a simple format. Two songs and some little talk. It’s usually 7-10 minutes long, and posted in time for you to listen to it in the morning while you drink coffee or sit on the can with your iDevice or whatnot balanced on your left knee.

Check it out. If you are a iTunes user, leave a review and rate the fucker. I can use the boost.

The Podcast Home: Terminal Signal

The facebook page:


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Google’s ebook partnership with Indie Bookstores? Fucked.

Google’s ebook partnership with Indie Bookstores? Fucked.

Last month, I told y’all about the Indiebound Reader, and how Google was helping to make it possible for the Brick and Mortar independent bookstores to compete in an increasingly digital world.

If I had waited a month, I could have saved some bandwidth.

Google will be ending their ebooks reseller program by the end of January 2013, according to Google’s digital publishing director Scott Dougal on the Inside Google Books Blog

One part of that effort — the reseller program — has not gained the traction that we hoped it would, so we have made the difficult decision to discontinue it by the end of January next year.

Ending a relationship like this can’t be against Google’s “Don’t Be Evil” code. But would it really hurt to maybe “Do Some Good”.

Does this program cost Google a significant  buck? I don’t think so. Would it have hurt to keep the program in place?

Google’s new Play store, designed to compete with Apple’s App store, now features books to buy and download to your device. And with the word of a Google branded tablet on the way, I’m sure that they plan on selling more ebooks through the Play store, and working with resellers may bite into those profits.

But if working with resellers isn’t gaining traction, then I don’t see a threat there.

I can’t believe that the company who wasted our time with Google Wave (which could have been cool), and says that they don’t give a fuck if anyone uses Google+, can’t be cool enough to let the little guy  in on some of that internets money.

Don’t just Don’t be Evil, Google. Be Decent.

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IndieBound Reader! Buy Fucking E-books and Still Support Indie Bookstores!

IndieBound Reader! Buy Fucking E-books and Still Support Indie Bookstores!

Impossible, right?

Yeah, I thought so too, until I stumbled upon

First, let me get some stuff out into the open. I’m a fan of Barnes & Noble. I like it there. I like sitting and reading a book while I drink my coffee. I even buy books there. Partly because I am cash poor, buy lots of books and have a membership card that gets me 10% off, and more for new stuff.

Okay. I also support my local Indie Bookstores whenever I can. I love me some indie book stores, and indie record stores, etc. I usually get used books and cd’s at those places.

Recently, I have been thinking about epublishing. And what that means is that on some level I would have to support the idea of ebooks, and the loss to Brick and Mortar stores. I would become one of the people that don’t push open doors and smell the musty aroma of old books, or the fresh paper and ink of new books. And this makes me sad.

I like book stores. Almost as much as I like books. By which I mean the physical representations of books made out of things like paper.

Barnes and Noble will not vanish from this earth anytime soon. They have their nook. An e-reader that can be used to buy books online. But what of the indie bookstores? What do they have?

Motherfuckers, they have this…

The IndieBound Reader.  It’s an app available for Android and iOS devices that allows you to purchase ebooks from your local (participating) indie book store.

Here, they say stuff on their site better than I do on mine.

IndieBound is a community-oriented movement begun by the American Booksellers Association. It brings together booksellers, readers, indie retailers, local business alliances, and anyone else with a passionate belief that healthy local economies help communities thrive. Successful local, indie businesses help dollars, jobs, diversity, choice, and taxes stay local, creating strong, unique communities and happy citizens.

Independent bookstores have partnered with Google to sell Google eBooks™ because of its open and accessible platform, so indies can provide an easy way for their customers to discover, read, and buy ebooks at while supporting local business. The ebooks are sold directly through independent bookstore websites.

Well! Fantastic!

Some backstory:

I use the kindle app on my phone, but until recently I hadn’t actually bought any books to read. I stuck with the free stuff that is in public domain. You know, old shit. Luckily, I like old shit, and mostly used the app to read when I had some time to kill and didn’t have a paperback in my pocket.

Then came the Dresden Files series. I started reading those books, and got sucked in. I won’t review them now, but let’s just say that I like them. I’ve been buying two at a time at the book store.

I finished my latest book in the middle of the night and immediately began chewing on my left arm. So using my kindle app, I bought and downloaded the next book. Amazon dug that, but I felt a little bad for all the Brick and Mortar guys. I bought the next few at the store, and felt a little better about that.

Then I discovered, quite accidentally, the website, which is a community of indie bookstores and the people that love them. And then I saw a link on their site that said “Indies Sell Ebooks”. One clicky later, and I feel like the guy who discovered sliced bread (not the first guy, or the guy who invented it… just a guy who stumbled on it after nicking his fingers on bread knives for most of his life).

I downloaded the app to my phone, and found a local indie bookstore. And let it sit there.

Yesterday, I finished the other Dresden Files books. I was all caught up but for the last one “Ghost Story”. I could have gone to the Brick and Mortar for it. Instead, I went to my phone.

I bought the book.  I bought it from Literary Bookpost, an indie bookstore in Salisbury, NC (my closest indie bookstore does not yet participate). My money went to a local bookstore, my taxes went to the state and I got the book without leaving my house.

Well, I bought it at work, but you know what I mean.

The app is really nice. It works well, and seems to have more and better features than my kindle app. It works quickly, smoothly and I read Ghost Story in about 6 hours using it.

So yes! By all means, when possible buy ebooks from your local indie bookstore. Living in the future doesn’t always have to mean fucking over the past.

Now I’m waiting to buy music the same way.

Here’s the app links:

IndieBound Reader iOS

IndieBound Reader Android

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Kickstart This! Lexicons of Dueling

My brother can use a sword. He’s also a smart guy and avid geek and gamer. He and some of his friends have come up with a card game called Lexicons of Dueling. It looks to be really cool, and they’re currently looking for some assist via KickStarter.

So do yourself a favor. Go check it out. And kick in a little, damn it!

Click the link below to go to their Kickstarter page:

And here is the facebook group link. If you’re on the facebook (who am I kidding, of course you’re on the facebook!) you can get more information here: Lexicons of Dueling

Go! Now! And thanks for helping support cool stuff.


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